I did NOT.......

I am copying this post idea just because it is the best one I have seen in a while....and because..

I was not the crazy lady who jumped amazingly high to grab the free king size candy bar they were tossing out at the midnight showing of Twilight. I did not get so excited about Hershey's with almonds that I fell on the arm rest and my leg got squished in the cupholder as someone else did not land on top of me. It did not hurt like a mother and make me blink back tears and so it looked like I was weeping for Edward.

I most certainly did not burn my hand because I grabbed a candle that was burning for hours, to blow it out. I have been lighting/blowing out candles for like, 30 years or so, and I am sure I would never do that. I also would not swear and drop the hot wax when my thumb didn't sizzle against the glass.

I swear I didn't skip breakfast and then count down the minutes until McDonald's serves lunch to go get a Big Mac. I would not eat something so huge, gross, and unhealthy, and I really wouldn't eat it and think it tasted great and wolf it down in a matter of of minutes. And that would never make me skip down the aisles of the grocery store because my belly is happy and full.


I also did not spend $12.00 on two ornaments that I had to have. I would never get suckered in to walking down the Christmas aisle and actually falling for the most expensive ornaments on the shelf. Never. Even if they would look great on my tree I am sure I would save that money for canned corn and butter.

I also did not decide to just SIT after Thanksgiving dinner and let all the other valiant volunteers wash all the dishes. I know I would never feel relieved that someone else started cleaning up first and I would NEVER tell myself that too many people in the kitchen is chaotic.

And I also should make it clear that I did not just get stuck on the neighbors roof while trying to knock my son's ball out of the big tree in our back yard. I did not have a gathering of neighbor kids cheering me on, and then realizing when it was time to climb down that I was scared to death. I did not make such a spectacle of myself and would never do such a silly thing.

That goes for all of the above.