Mom's Art Journal

I have mentioned in the past how journaling and art journaling have sometimes saved the sanity of this mama.
Two summers ago I attended my first class in a studio setting, with 11 other women looking for ways to creatively express themselves.  We started art journals that day, and I recently finished my own little project.

Here are my best tips about art journaling for those who may be stuck, haven't finished one yet, or are thinking of starting an art journal.

Juicy Soul art journal 

Don't worry too much about the book you use.  
I bought a spiral bound art book that has very thick pages, but truth be told I found the pages were a little too hefty at times. You can choose to embellish the covers (like top journal here) or leave them blank and smudged with the drippings of your works (like the middle gray cover that is barely peeking out).  Honestly, it will be easiest just find something you like the look and feel of.

Don't worry too much about page prep. 
 You can find a variety of opinions on page prep. Some people gesso pages, some people glue in other paint grade papers, some people leave everything as it is.  The most important thing I learned was that the page needs to be thick enough for supporting your layers of art.  If you are using a thinner page (like some moleskin journals or even just old books) a little Elmers glue or other paper bonding agent  of your choice is a great way to double pages up.  Just glue them together so each page is actually two pages glued together. Do this a few days before you start working in the journal, giving it time to dry.

Get something on that page. 
 Don't stare at the blank page for too long.  Slap down some color, stick on some washi or masking tape, or glue down some strips or torn paper....just cover up the blankness and go from there.  I have started some pages with the end in mind, and worked to make it happen, but usually I just start layering stuff I like, and building on that.  This is where it gets more creative and frankly, a little more therapeutic, as you just let yourself go without too many expectations.

mixed media background

Layered paper, drips of paint, acrylic sprays and stencils can just be used over and over until you get something you find interesting. The goal is to cover that blank page and freely start playing.  Sometimes the backgrounds are my absolute favorite part of the whole piece.  Sometimes I don't like how they end up, but that is beauty of working in an art journal- you are seeing what you like, what makes you happy, and what techniques you don't care for.  It is almost like a lesson manual for your creative time, because you are learning what your are comfortable with- and because you aren't swapping with any one else you really can be a little more free and expressive.

Put something you love on every page. 
This is where I usually get the most satisfaction from my journals.  I tend to be visual, enjoying interesting stamps or images, and so making them work on my page is what I find the most fun.

Lovely Life mixed media art journal page

Because I have a slight obsession with pretty phrases and inspiring quotes, I like to find ways to use them on my journal pages as well. 

Religious quote art journal page

Fill it with lots of small elements you are drawn too, and in the end you will have a nice variety of images that show the moods you had, as well the new things you tried creatively.  

Expressing myself on a bad day

Mixed Media art journal layout - Life as a Gift

Remember to take baby steps.

My first filled art journal took a year to finish.  I did other things on the side and sometimes didn't even open it for months.  Most days, I would sit down and throw one or two elements on, then walk away for a day or two.  Occasionally I would hunker down and do an entire layout while the boys all watched  a football game or on a  night when the house was empty, but even at that a good half hour at your table will make a lot of progress.  Find little bites of time and use them.  Put down the phone, don't check Facebook again- and sit down with the things you bought with the best of intentions to create with. (speaking from experience). It will add up to something beautiful.

Stencils, paint, printed images and stickers for this mixed media layout

.

If you don't like something- just push past it.

This is a hard one. We see gorgeous pictures on blogs (believe me, these are carefully picked!) and Pinterest and scoff at our own works.  Don't dwell on pages you hate.  Sometimes you may be inspired to go back and add stuff later, sometimes you will just flip past it quickly and be glad you learned that lesson. Either option is okay, and pushes you as someone who is trying to make pretty stuff. Keep going.

Luckily we live in a world of You Tube and Pinterest and there are more tutorials than you can dream of.  This is great for getting exposure to new things and seeing how other creative people use their supplies and make their pages.  I enjoy an occasional splurge on an Art Journaling magazine or book, and love the results I get when I learn from those sources as well. This is a pretty sight after only a 14 months of playing around in the art journal world;

Art journals and penpal smashbook

It probably sounds silly, but these artsy journals, smashbooks of creativity, are like  little peeks into myself, and they make me very happy. If you haven't started an art journal now is a great time to just make one little background. Use what you have- acrylic paint, magazines, favorite photos- WHATEVER- just start throwing something together.  If you started one already but have neglected it find a few minutes to dig it out and revisit it.  Put a little but of YOU down on paper.  I am sharing my entire journal flip through below.  

Leave a link in the comments to your images and pieces you have made.

And keep going. 

Real Life Depression

I have had a little voice nagging me lately to share some of my personal thoughts about depression.  I have light-heartedly referred to it in the past, and most of those close to me have heard me discuss it, but I have never really publicly opened up about the struggle I have had off and on throughout most of my adult life with depression.

Just over a month ago someone close to one of my children committed suicide.  We cried. We talked about it. We went to the funeral...... and the years I have spent drifting above the spell of depression started to come to a screeching halt as that experience rocked my world.  It seemed ridiculous that it would trigger such a response, but it did.  Now that the clouds have somewhat lifted from that fall (although I cried about that funeral and that dear teenager who is now gone this very morning) the nagging is back.
You need to share this. 
So here is some sharing.

I am a survivor of depression.  This is what it looked like for me:
crying spells that lasted for days - thinking about death and imagining floating above my own funeral - thinking of all the ways I was a bad person - thinking about my shortcomings, my fights with people, my weight, my looks, my failures as a mother - attempting on several occasions suicide (although never successful and in retrospect I see these more as expressions but not true attempts) - telling myself and people around me things would be better if I was gone - losing energy to get dressed or get up - and more....
 in the midst of all of this I acted fairly normal around others.

In the midst of all of this I also stayed spiritual and consider myself to be pretty devout in my religion.

This is the strange thing..... it wasn't a lack of faith that triggered these episodes, which occurred on and off for over 20 years.  I have faith. I love my Savior and Heavenly Father.  But depression is different than that- it is like the riptide current of a beautiful ocean- just waiting for you to wade in too deeply and so it can pull you under.  It is sneaky and it is constant and you can not just shake it off.  I validate and understand this about the disease.  HOWEVER there are things you can do to fight the riptides depression.

For me, a year and a half on medication did wonders.  It took two tries to find one that worked well, but the right one was what I needed for a particular battle I was having a hard time overcoming. After some time on it, I lived off it again, and then after a relapse I got back on. It can be a lifesaver, so pay attention if you think you need that help. Whether or not you are on medication the following things also helped me cope and endure my hard falls with depression.

1-) Realize hard times and sad thoughts are NORMAL and they are part of life.   Here's the reality- life is fair in that it is unfair to everyone.  The self talking that says your struggles are harder than other people's struggles is just a lie.  Life is supposed to be hard- it is a wonderful, brilliant learning ground for our souls, and would be ineffective if everything came easy. Stop telling yourself that your life is harder than anyone else's!   A better thought -
" this is a struggle for me right now.  I acknowledge it is hard, and that is okay."
Acceptance is a huge part of the journey. Resistance adds to the pain you are experiencing.  You hurt. You are disappointed.  You have had awful things happen. Welcome to life. Beauty is just around the corner....I promise.

2-) Escape into an uplifting and healthy activity.    There is a need to do things that make your heart sing and your soul happy.  Find those things, or if you used to have hobbies revisit them.  Spirituality is a big one for me, attending my church services and temple worship, plus home study of scriptures and gospel topics.  Art is another one- playing in paint and expressing myself on paper.  I also am an avid reader, a part-time (slow) runner, and letter writer.  All of these are good activities and many of them connect me with other people. Be wise and disciplined here.... video gaming alone (or on your phone), marathon Netflix watching and sad movie watching is not going to be uplifting or healthy.  Cutting, drug use, or alcohol use may feel like an escape, but these things are addicting and incredibly dangerous.  You want to heal, not get worse. The point is to do something that helps you celebrate life and makes you happy. I am sure we could talk about endorphins here, but really.....if it works the science behind it is just a side note.  Find something good to do and do it!

3-) Trust in God's timing.   I was a happy child.  Depression struck me smack dab alongside puberty.  Around 40 some issues in our family hit, and while dealing with those my depression literally subsided.  I am not going to go into details here, but suffice it to say some very spiritual experiences and sacred moments seemed to wash me, as they can you, and the obsession with death was completely taken out of my thinking patterns, almost 30 years after they were planted there.  Recently it has snuck back into my life, and I have had to be honest that this is an illness that most likely will come and go throughout my walk on earth.  I don't understand this and I can't give you a formula for success, but I can tell you this- one day all of us will be healed from our afflictions.  Peace will be more abundant if you are open, patient, and trusting in the will and timing of our God.  His timing is one of the hardest things for us to surrender to, but His timing is perfect.

In my journals I often reflect on 'highlights' of the past week or month.  While individual trials seem hard and certain days feel long, I am amazed by the sweetness of life.  When I take time to write down the magical, simple, and happy  moments I have had I am just overcome with the gratitude of a full life, a real life, and the chance I have to experience it.  I do this often now, and it instantly fills my heart with joy and makes me feel a little closer to heaven.

I hope something I have written speaks to someone out there.  I have no idea who you are, where you are, or how you are even coming to this blog- but it is for a reason.

God is aware of you.
Everything is going to be okay.
Keep fighting and never, ever, ever give up.

go here for inspiring thoughts and insight
Sitting on the Bench - thoughts on suicide prevention
Hear LDS leader Jeffrey Holland speak with power and truth about depression HERE
Suicide prevention - go here to chat, read, or call someone for help

Seeking Divine Intervention

On Mother's Day my grandma passed away. She earned her spot in heaven, mind you, living 91 years of a full and inspirational life.  Her death has left me really pondering this life and the next, how the two are intertwined, and the plans God has for each of us.

Not too long ago I heard an excellent talk by John L. Lund, who I have been a fan of for years, but this hit a particular nerve for me. (Maybe due to miracles I have seen).  After sharing this with several close friends in need,  today I felt the urge to share these ideas on my blog.

 I hope they help someone out there. If it's you, God bless.....if not, pass them on to someone who might benefit.

There will be times in your life where you need the hand of God to move you forward.  We all have those times, and life was designed to push you to your limits and cause you to grow, but it isn't always easy.  Dr. Lund teaches 5 principles of divine intervention- how God intervenes in our journey. (these are from the class series "How to Hug a Teenage Porcupine")

1- The Lord will soften your heart, or the heart of another- this may cause a change in behavior or life choices, or a softening on your side to no longer be burdened

2- The Lord will give you strength- this is a noticable, definite gift of strength beyond your own, blessing you with resolve to continure through your trial in faith

3- The Lord raises someone else to do what you can not.  Another person enters the situation, your life, or the life of another, and does what you are unable to do.  Their presence in your life brings about the changes needed and they can offer the help you seek

4- You undergo an Exodus- you are (or the person in need is)  being led on or you are led away, perhaps a new location, relationship, or job. It can come in many ways, but it leads you out of the trial that binds you into your present state

5- The Lord removes the problem - the issue is resolved or suddenly removed, often in a merciful and miraculous way

I was touched by these concepts the moment I heard them.  Not only do they help me know how to pray for help and guidance (as you can see possibilities are often beyond our own vision) but I have also been able to reflect back over my life and see how many times divine intervention has blessed me.  It can happen again and again for all of us. Recognizing this gift can strengthen your faith for future trials, and giving thanks for past help can bring about a great positive shift in thinking as you gain more confidence  in the Lord.

A few things to remember as you seek divine intervention;
Sanctify your life.  Kick out the obvious harsh stuff....I know God loves you no matter what, but it gets hard to pick up the signal he sends if we aren't tuned in properly.  Clean up the things that make it hard for you to hear God in your life. Bad temper?  Too much drinking? Reading or watching things that aren't uplifting? You get the idea...these things make it hard for us to see the angelic hands in our lives.
Pray.  Just pray. Talk out loud to God and dump it out...he is waiting to hear it (he knows it all anyway!) so get real and let your heart speak and break before him.  If you feel your prayer needs some extra voltage, then fast. Skip a meal or two (or 3) and go somewhere where you can talk to God alone, out loud.  I am what most people would call a 'religious' person, but that is only because I adore my religion as it teaches me how to get closer to God.  This is what prayer does, this is what fasting does.  Especially when you do it right.  Push your physical a bit so you can rely on your spiritual self.  It can be life changing.
Be patient.  God is orchestrating a symphony, not a solo, in which you are a beloved instrument.  Give him time to work out all the parts, and he will come through for you. That I promise. (for more on this concept I recommend the book The Shack by Paul Young....it will uplift you and open your eyes to the wonders of God in the midst of trials, in a very simple story that has some powerful concepts, it is not doctrinal, but very interesting)

The trick is to remain in the beautiful place that only the faithful can be in.  A place of peace in the midst of troubles.  A place of stillness in the middle of storms.  For me, it means repeating scripture or hymns when negative thoughts choke me, and it works.




my shepherd will supply my need

The above collage I made for a friend who recently lost a child after an ugly adoption battle that she had taken home from the hospital and raised as her own for almost two years.  She struggles daily, yet still remains faithful and humble in her trial.  She is an incredible example to me of how to truly rely on the Lord when our strength is spent.

 If she can do it... so can you.

May you be blessed this Sunday and allow God's hand to direct your life.

Life is good.... God is better

Mini Disaster

I guess you can call it a disaster.

I hate to do it, because it could have been so much worse, but it still shook me up pretty good.

We had a pipe burst in our basement.

This was my pride and joy just a few days ago

My very own crafting corner.

It was my sanctuary filled with all my favorite treasures

and goodies acquired in trades.

I was so happy about my space!

This is how my space looked when I got called home from the water park yesterday

(thank heavens a thousand times over my son stayed home and was here when it happened)

my drawers, my jars, my baskets and totes, all filled with water

I panicked, no doubt about it.

The pictures are so random because I was sobbing as I took them.

Hubby is out of town this week and I had no idea how I was going to conquer an entire basement of sopping wet boxes and books and supplies.

I didn't realize my sisters were on their way, and they took control of the situation and started setting things out to dry immediately.

I thought it was mostly my crafting goods, but everything was soaked in our entire basement. As we started emptying boxes we found the harsh truth....pictures. Lots of pictures. And numerous scrapbooks from my wedding and first years of marriage, my first baby being born.... I was losing it. My sisters stayed focus and set to rescuing it all.

We hung pages and laid pictures out carefully...a neighbor stopped by to see what was happening and bless her heart,she shed tears with me as we pulled my husband's photos from his mission he served over 20 years ago out of a sopping wet album.

Even sealed bags and containers were filled with water

These photos do not have digital copies, and I really had no idea they were stashed away with my craft supplies. It broke my heart to see them laying out as the sun started to go down, hours after we started the process.

In the garage things sat over night trying to dry out and wait for me to make sense of what can be saved.

Another thing that upset me was to see so many of my books ruined. They were like sponges, swollen and sopping, and just fell apart when you tried to move them. My favorite, marked up, well loved copy of Atlas Shrugged completely fell apart today when I tried to open it.

I am not sure if my crying is symbolic, therapeutic or even normal anymore....

I just keep losing it.

In case you wonder what a girl like me looks like on the morning after a day like yesterday wonder no more.

Bags under the eyes, greasy hair, blotchy skin....it is my badge of honor today.

And even though we lost a few precious things

(this bubbled picture is one of the few baby pics I have of my husband)

We saved hundreds and hundreds pictures and pages all together.

Today I pulled my 'baby blanket' out of a wet box I hadn't got to yet...I am so relieved with all the important things we have found just in time.

I can't complain in spite of the sadness. We are so blessed, we have so much... my heart actually aches for people who lose everything....EVERYTHING to a natural disaster.

My sisters and my kids and my neighbor made what would have taken me days take only hours to salvage and sort. I am so grateful to them for their help.

I hope I am blessed to remember this moment and help others more in the future.

Even standing beside someone or saving one thing for them is a gift.

I believe we will need it more in the days to come.

I hope others may blessed as I was in my time of panic and need.

Spring Tag Time

One of the bonus benefits of being from a large family, who is also a creative group of women, is the instant artistic swaps we can organize. One quick Facebook message will start a tag swap for a dozen of us at a time.

I just finished my spring tags to exchange with sisters, nieces, and my mom.

I love the idea of running patterned and colored paper through the printer.

This tag background is from the free image gallery at Ceremony.

I love how it turned out on this paper.

After finding some sort of mixed media vintage image that I was excited about, (not hard at Moonlight Journey) and some spring sentiments, I could start assembling the tags.

Funny, I was so in love with that birdcage, and then I just covered it up.

Oh well, part of the process is loving what you do step by step.

Adding a few more tidbits and an ink stamp or two, and I am finally liking the final image

The quote comes from the following poem

If I Had my Life to Live Over Again

I'd dare to make more mistakes next time.

I'd relax, I would limber up.

I would be sillier than I have been this trip.

I would take fewer things seriously.

I would take more chances.

I would climb more mountains and swim more rivers.

I would eat more ice cream and less beans.

I would perhaps have more actual troubles,

but I'd have fewer imaginary ones.

You see, I'm one of those people who live

sensibly and sanely hour after hour,

day after day.

Oh, I've had my moments,

And if I had it to do over again,

I'd have more of them.

In fact, I'd try to have nothing else.

Just moments, one after another,

instead of living so many years ahead of each day.

I've been one of those people who never goes anywhere

without a thermometer, a hot water bottle, a raincoat

and a parachute.

If I had to do it again, I would travel lighter than I have.

If I had my life to live over,

I would start barefoot earlier in the spring

and stay that way later in the fall.

I would go to more dances.

I would ride more merry-go-rounds.

I would pick more daisies.

Nadine Stair,

85 years old.

What would you do differently if you did it over again?

Easter Inspiration for the Creative

To all the women I follow who create lovely rooms, yards, tags, collages, clothing, jewelry and beautiful lives around me : this gift of truly sacred words I pass along to you

Sit for 2 minutes and celebrate with me our ability to create

I am overwhelmed by the beautiful things I see

that speak to me and revive me.

And for the power to create

I am ever grateful

Happy Easter

(photos: room by Weheartthis.com and Fearless by Papaya Art)

Inspire Me

Today is a rare day. I have nothing...I repeat NOTHING on my calendar until tonight. Normally I schedule these days to clean up, catch up around the house, or catch up with my DVR. I don't want to do any of that.

I want to look at lovely things that make me feel romantic

I need to find inspiration for my Valentines Swap

last year's Valentines were fun and romantic

And Bergdorf Goodman is inducing day dreams of romantic hair, boots, lacy clothing, and a bike ride in the spring

So, while the house may sit untouched for today

In my mind I have been very productive

Arts and Craftiness

I have not been able to create anything for a while. That makes me a little bit crazy, so I like it when I have an excuse to cut and paste and stamp.

Our show recently opened and I was determined to make a little somethin-somethin for the other "wives" of the brothers in the play.

(Me and a few of the "wives", plus one brother that can't resist a photo op. We are in our Egyptian costumes, which are just too fun too miss.

ANYWAY I found some amazing graphics for an amazing deal at the Cute and Cool shop of Itkupilli, and so I made these little tags by using her graphics, adding a saying, and topping it with my favorite stamp.

I stuffed little bags with the tags, some chocolate (a backstage must) some gum (an onstage must) and a few crackers in case anyone needed a snack.


These were surprisingly easy and I will definitely be using this idea for future friends/sister/neighbor treats. I am always happy to find a simple thing to pull together that looks cute. I got the luggage tags at Staples and the bags at Hobby Lobby.


I am also happy to say the EAR is completely better ( who would have thought earwax could put you in bed?) but due to the disgusting details, I am not posting about that. I am feeling SO MUCH better for a few reasons (different post), and instead of telling my friend that cuts my hair to just 'trim it', I decided to actually get a new style. I know people say cutting your hair isn't that big of a deal, but I feel like a new woman.

AND PS- my kids started school yesterday!!!! Shhhh, don't tell...
I may just read blogs all day

Random bits of Lovely

It's been a while since I linked to Cindy at Romantic Homes, and every time I do it challenges me to find something pretty to look at- not that my glamour shot below isn't absolutely gorgeous, but still...... I want to play in this link up, so here are a few little bits of lovely.

What is about dolls, vintage toys, and babies? This little bit has all three, how can you go wrong? A charm for a friend made in blog land, with a handmade envelope and label to greet her. It is nice to send something off to someone you know will appreciate it.
A photo of my charm, with a cool little charm necklace my husband bought home for me from Korea.


And finally, a quick home Do-It-Yourself tip that any girl can handle.

How to replace the hole in your poor, tattered, cottage's wall that your son made by practicing his throw against it Start by measuring the hole. This is very important, as you will see here.

You need to make sure it is covered

by the star on sale at your local decor store.

See, now doesn't that look better?