Monday, December 1, 2008

I did NOT.......

I am copying this post idea just because it is the best one I have seen in a while....and because..


I was not the crazy lady who jumped amazingly high to grab the free king size candy bar they were tossing out at the midnight showing of Twilight. I did not get so excited about Hershey's with almonds that I fell on the arm rest and my leg got squished in the cupholder as someone else did not land on top of me. It did not hurt like a mother and make me blink back tears and so it looked like I was weeping for Edward.

I most certainly did not burn my hand because I grabbed a candle that was burning for hours, to blow it out. I have been lighting/blowing out candles for like, 30 years or so, and I am sure I would never do that. I also would not swear and drop the hot wax when my thumb didn't sizzle against the glass.

I swear I didn't skip breakfast and then count down the minutes until McDonald's serves lunch to go get a Big Mac. I would not eat something so huge, gross, and unhealthy, and I really wouldn't eat it and think it tasted great and wolf it down in a matter of of minutes. And that would never make me skip down the aisles of the grocery store because my belly is happy and full.


I also did not spend $12.00 on two ornaments that I had to have. I would never get suckered in to walking down the Christmas aisle and actually falling for the most expensive ornaments on the shelf. Never. Even if they would look great on my tree I am sure I would save that money for canned corn and butter.









I also did not decide to just SIT after Thanksgiving dinner and let all the other valiant volunteers wash all the dishes. I know I would never feel relieved that someone else started cleaning up first and I would NEVER tell myself that too many people in the kitchen is chaotic.







And I also should make it clear that I did not just get stuck on the neighbors roof while trying to knock my son's ball out of the big tree in our back yard. I did not have a gathering of neighbor kids cheering me on, and then realizing when it was time to climb down that I was scared to death. I did not make such a spectacle of myself and would never do such a silly thing.

That goes for all of the above.

21 comments:

Kristina P. said...

Ouch! That bruise looks super painful!

Brooke said...

Wow, that is quite the bruise. I'm sure it was worth it, though. I'm with you on the McDonald's thing. I can't admit that I like it, because I DON'T.

clan of the cave hair said...

that bruise looks nasty woman!

Mina said...

Well, I am sure glad you didn't do any of that, because I don't know if I can socialize with someone who did.

Erin said...

Those are beautiful ornaments that did not cost $12.00. And I'm so glad you got a picture of the bruise for posterity.

Jillybean said...

I didn't do any of those things either.

Ouchie on that bruise!! I hope the chocolate made it feel better.

Jo said...

Of course you wouldn't! I know you better than that. You, the always calm, cool, collected, perfectly mannered lady. And you would never, ever post these things so your bloggy friends could snicker. Of course not.

Wendyburd1 said...

Ouch!! and I hope you were careful on the roof, our neighbor across the street FELL off his roof this past weekend, we haven't heard more than he is stable!! Oy!

Michelle said...

OUCH!! But way funny post. LOL.

Mommy Madness said...

That bruise looks awful! Owwwee! Of course you didn't cry but I sure would've.

The ornaments are lovely. If....if....if you did buy I'm sure they would look great on you tree.

How did you get down off the tree? Hope the fire dept. didn't have to be called!LOL☺

LittleLovables said...

Haha, I have NEVER done any of those things either!

I mean, what mature grown up would get giddy over ornaments or jump for a candy bar at a Twilight showing?

Vanessa said...

That looks really painful! And the ornaments are beautiful, I would have done the same thing.

ramsam said...

My husband read this post and was like..."huh? I don't get it"

Jillene said...

The ornaments are beautiful!! I decorate with Santa's only in my house--o.k. and a few nativity things--LOVE them!!

The bruise looks painful but for a Hershey's with Almonds....TOTALLY worth it!!

So said...

Huge bruise! Yikes!

And I never tell myself that too many people in the kitchen is chaotic either.

Beautiful ornaments by the way!

Krissy said...

lol That's awesome!!! lol :D Your blog is great, thanks for stopping by mine! :)

Jessica G. said...

So...did you catch the Hershey's or not? ;)

Steph @ Diapers and Divinity said...

And I did not laugh out loud when I read this post. ;)

Strawberry Shortcake said...

This is hilarious, I mean I didn't just laugh hysterically in front of no one. Never :)

Bobie said...

McDonald's, King Size Hershey's, Beautiful Ornaments.... I absolutely would NOT do any of those!!!

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