Be Amazed - Stay Amazed

Last night I was dropping my son off at football practice- just doing what we always do when the fall hits

my baby boy- enjoying a football game break

After dropping him off I turned a corner in my neighborhood on the windy streets that kids love to play on.  Another football player, excited to be driving the family ATV barreled around the corner.
He was going to fast to see me, and I couldn't see him at all in the blind spot of my mini-van (dang, those thing have some huge A-pillars, right moms???)

Somehow, we missed each other.  It took me so much surprise that I didn't feel the THUNK of a 4-Wheeler in my side door that turned around to see the road where we passed.  I have no idea how we did it.

When I got home I told my husband "Man, I am so lucky! You wouldn't believe how close I came to taking out an 8th grader!"

Well this morning, as I was soaking in my bubble bath (which has become my private sermon time) I clicked on the following link from Joyce Meyer.

Living Amazed- Joyce Meyer

 (trust me- save the link and watch it later)


This spitfire of a woman preaches from the Bible in a non-denomination style that begs to be heard, felt, and practiced.   I found on her T.V.  months ago when I couldn't sleep one night, and I have been hooked ever since. I love to hear her fearlessly preach and watch her show a couple times a week.

In the Being Amazed lecture she talks about this very thing that I did. How we we get so used to God that we are no longer amazed at his miracles.  The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints uses a phrase which I love dearly..... "tender mercies".

I am sad to say I do not always sit amazed at God's hand in my everyday life, although I do it more now than I have in the past.  I mean, I have had miracles affect me in as big of things as the horrible accident our family went through, right down to the smaller mercy finding a backpack while school shopping when I absolutely was at the end of my rope.  I have had them in answered prayers in spiritual matters, far too personal for me to write here, to unexpected cash discounts that blessed us a little further....

I don't want to be guilty of taking God's goodness and merciful gifts for granted.

In this sermon Joyce also shows a box of journals she has.  This is dear to my heart because I always have a journal, a church notebook, and a scripture journal that I am working on.  I too, have my bin of remembrances.  She talks about writing down your prayers and desires of your heart.

This concept really hit home for me when I read (the ever life-changing) Remembering Wholeness, by Carol Tuttle.

This was a new way for me to use positive thinking, faith, and amazement and joy to attract more tender mercies.  Carol suggests you write your list every morning. I call mine my 'angel wish list' and while I don't do it every day, I do it A LOT.

My Angel List front cover

a morning's prayer and thoughts

I remember being nervous because I had returned a running jacket in the mail, and it was very expensive, and I hadn't heard anything about it, and was long over-due for it's return.  I was starting to feel anxious, so I asked for help this morning. I believe the jacket showed up the next day. I was also pleading for help in my work that day as I interacted with my clients, and for ease in our re-finance of our home loan (which later closed without a hitch, no closing costs, and very little effort on our part- it was AMAZING).  So, you see, I think, and I live on this belief, that God does care about the little things- those little things become big things without his guiding hand.  We aren't meant to live in anxiety, fear, or a stressed out state.  Write it down- and GIVE IT AWAY!

I even have a "master list" of my hearts desires- these are the biggies.  I have wished about Girls' Camp, going on a cruise, traveling to London, and getting a 'break' that would allow us to landscape our yard.
Guess what...check, check, check and check...all done.

So today I am telling you to first have the faith to ask, then stay in faith and be amazed.
The video link I posted is long- watch it while you do your dishes or fold laundry.  (or soak in the tub) She says it much better than I can.

Write down your hearts desires, remember to record your tender mercies, then sit back and prepare to be astonished.
If it's been a while since you have been blown away by goodness re-read your victories of the past.

Don't forget to be amazed.  The reasons are all around.

And, for the record, I am grateful for a safe journey home yesterday...both for me, and for that sweet boy on the street. It was not luck.
God is good.

Seeking Divine Intervention

On Mother's Day my grandma passed away. She earned her spot in heaven, mind you, living 91 years of a full and inspirational life.  Her death has left me really pondering this life and the next, how the two are intertwined, and the plans God has for each of us.

Not too long ago I heard an excellent talk by John L. Lund, who I have been a fan of for years, but this hit a particular nerve for me. (Maybe due to miracles I have seen).  After sharing this with several close friends in need,  today I felt the urge to share these ideas on my blog.

 I hope they help someone out there. If it's you, God bless.....if not, pass them on to someone who might benefit.

There will be times in your life where you need the hand of God to move you forward.  We all have those times, and life was designed to push you to your limits and cause you to grow, but it isn't always easy.  Dr. Lund teaches 5 principles of divine intervention- how God intervenes in our journey. (these are from the class series "How to Hug a Teenage Porcupine")

1- The Lord will soften your heart, or the heart of another- this may cause a change in behavior or life choices, or a softening on your side to no longer be burdened

2- The Lord will give you strength- this is a noticable, definite gift of strength beyond your own, blessing you with resolve to continure through your trial in faith

3- The Lord raises someone else to do what you can not.  Another person enters the situation, your life, or the life of another, and does what you are unable to do.  Their presence in your life brings about the changes needed and they can offer the help you seek

4- You undergo an Exodus- you are (or the person in need is)  being led on or you are led away, perhaps a new location, relationship, or job. It can come in many ways, but it leads you out of the trial that binds you into your present state

5- The Lord removes the problem - the issue is resolved or suddenly removed, often in a merciful and miraculous way

I was touched by these concepts the moment I heard them.  Not only do they help me know how to pray for help and guidance (as you can see possibilities are often beyond our own vision) but I have also been able to reflect back over my life and see how many times divine intervention has blessed me.  It can happen again and again for all of us. Recognizing this gift can strengthen your faith for future trials, and giving thanks for past help can bring about a great positive shift in thinking as you gain more confidence  in the Lord.

A few things to remember as you seek divine intervention;
Sanctify your life.  Kick out the obvious harsh stuff....I know God loves you no matter what, but it gets hard to pick up the signal he sends if we aren't tuned in properly.  Clean up the things that make it hard for you to hear God in your life. Bad temper?  Too much drinking? Reading or watching things that aren't uplifting? You get the idea...these things make it hard for us to see the angelic hands in our lives.
Pray.  Just pray. Talk out loud to God and dump it out...he is waiting to hear it (he knows it all anyway!) so get real and let your heart speak and break before him.  If you feel your prayer needs some extra voltage, then fast. Skip a meal or two (or 3) and go somewhere where you can talk to God alone, out loud.  I am what most people would call a 'religious' person, but that is only because I adore my religion as it teaches me how to get closer to God.  This is what prayer does, this is what fasting does.  Especially when you do it right.  Push your physical a bit so you can rely on your spiritual self.  It can be life changing.
Be patient.  God is orchestrating a symphony, not a solo, in which you are a beloved instrument.  Give him time to work out all the parts, and he will come through for you. That I promise. (for more on this concept I recommend the book The Shack by Paul Young....it will uplift you and open your eyes to the wonders of God in the midst of trials, in a very simple story that has some powerful concepts, it is not doctrinal, but very interesting)

The trick is to remain in the beautiful place that only the faithful can be in.  A place of peace in the midst of troubles.  A place of stillness in the middle of storms.  For me, it means repeating scripture or hymns when negative thoughts choke me, and it works.




my shepherd will supply my need

The above collage I made for a friend who recently lost a child after an ugly adoption battle that she had taken home from the hospital and raised as her own for almost two years.  She struggles daily, yet still remains faithful and humble in her trial.  She is an incredible example to me of how to truly rely on the Lord when our strength is spent.

 If she can do it... so can you.

May you be blessed this Sunday and allow God's hand to direct your life.

Life is good.... God is better

Religious Print Redo

I had an empty wall above my piano that I recently filled and have enjoyed the result...

Last year we had the privilage of viewing many of Carl Heinrich Bloch's religious works at a local university.

The paintings were all stunning, and  I have had this framed print for some years.

My dad found it at a yard sale and bought it, and I was able to buy it off of him.

( he tends to get a little overstocked from yard sales and second hand stores)

It came in a gold frame, which has never done much for me.

I covered the glass (it looked complicated to pull it all apart, so I took the lazy way out)

and then I just used acrylic paint on the frame.

I really liked the sort of scratchy look that I got with one coat, so I left it at that.

It did take some dabbing and work to get the paint into the etched designs on the frame's edge,

 but it was easy and the paint dried quick.

The frame was dry and ready to hang in about 30 minutes.

After passing an empty wall for months in our new house I am actually pretty happy to have a little

new spot that feels like home.

And the vinyl wall phrase as a constant reminder isn't bad either.....

may you be inspired to

create a space today

Random Catch Up

Life is kind of like this in the summer-

I move from one moment to the next and hardly have time to stop and reflect

So, welcome to my random catch up.

I am so in love with the 4th of July,

I really can't say it enough

This year it was all about the food, the folks, and the photography.

A day trip to the "Twilight Zone" (Forks and La Push, Wa)

ended up being a surprise highlight of our trip.

All the men involved were much obliging to my silly photos and squealing. I am not above enjoying a completely pointless book on occasion.

And stomping on the stomping grounds was a fun indulgence.

(When is the next movie out, anyway?)

My niece's wedding gave me a chance to extend my vacation,

and spend some real downtime (16 days!) with my family.

Everything was fairy tale perfect, from the bride and groom, to the candle lit tables,

and all the pretty pinks.

Can I just say....I LOVE WEDDINGS!

On that note, I must simply say how precious my religion is to me at this moment in time.

Not only because of the beautiful weddings and belief

in families being together, as a unit, in the next life, but also because

of the precious gift of freedom and agency.

I feel the world would be a better place if people believed in a higher purpose and a higher power, and lived accordingly.

To love something on the level that most religious people do only means one thing;

it makes sense to share it with others.

For my church, that means two years of service.

What a day it was when my nephew came home from his two tough years in Paraguay.

Our family went from screaming, to crying, and back again,

as he came through that lobby.

It is great to have him back, but he is going through withdraws of not serving others and being back in the 'real world'.

One cool thing that impressed me while waiting there was the applause that spread through the airport as a service man or woman came off the flight.

I think when our eyes are open we see more than enough around us

to know we are blessed

to know we are loved

and to know these gifts must be defended with all our hearts.

Easter Inspiration for the Creative

To all the women I follow who create lovely rooms, yards, tags, collages, clothing, jewelry and beautiful lives around me : this gift of truly sacred words I pass along to you

Sit for 2 minutes and celebrate with me our ability to create

I am overwhelmed by the beautiful things I see

that speak to me and revive me.

And for the power to create

I am ever grateful

Happy Easter

(photos: room by Weheartthis.com and Fearless by Papaya Art)

The fire that's breaking my heart

A brief history as on file at BYU of the Provo Tabernacle

The Provo Tabernacle, located on the west side of University Avenue between Center and First South streets, has figured prominently in the history of Brigham Young University. It was built by the Saints of Utah Valley at a time when money was difficult to obtain. Fifteen years, from 1883 to 1898, were required for its construction, largely because of financial limitations. From 1930 to 1941, when the Joseph Smith Building was completed, BYU commencement exercises were held in the building, the procession proceeding from the Education Building to the Tabernacle, a distance of six blocks. The Tabernacle was used for lyceum concerts even into the 1950s, and organ recitals of the Music Department continued there through the 1960s. Some of the artists who have appeared there have been violinist Fritz Kreisler, pianist Sergei Rachmaninoff, baritone Paul Robeson, soprano Bidu Sayao, the Minneapolis Symphony (1918), the Metropolitan Quartet (1916), opera star Emma Lucy Gates (1923), the Bach Festival (1934), and dozens of others. The dome in the center of the building was removed later because of excessive weight.

The building has been host to countless ceremonies, concerts (as a high school student I sang there with my choir) graduations, weddings, church meetings and more over the years. Just last Saturday I marveled over the beauty of the building. It was my second concert of the season with my son singing.

And this morning we woke to this

It hard to believe that beautiful organ, woodwork, stained glass, and detailing that I captured with my silly little camera is gone.

For the record I must say that building had a spirit about it.

I performed and listened to others perform there.

It was place beyond many you might step foot in.

I am so sad at this historical lost, yet feel blessed we were there just days ago, and my son got a final chance, that we did not know was final, to be a part of that great heritage.

If you have a few minutes, I invite you to share in the spirit of music and Christmas by watching this song my son performed with the choir when we were last there. Merry Christmas. May the Lord bless you and keep you.

Easy Breezy Beautiful 2008

This will be by far the most self indulgent post I have yet to type. I can't help myself, and after flipping through the pages of my blog book preview, I am going to take the time to really post about my life.

Last year may have possibly been one of the best years ever. After years of mocking my sisters (and other people) who run, I gave it a shot. It was hard, it hurt, it made me tired....but I got better.

This picture was taken on Thanksgiving morning, when my family decided to run in the races- the fact that 2 of my kids signed up made me very proud- feeling like a bit of fitness is seeping into our lives. Let me explain one other thing- by nature I am extremely competitive. To run with my sisters and only keep up with them when they are pushing strollers with TWO kids up a hill goes against everything I am. If I can not win at something, I refuse to participate. This hobby has forced me to relax, enjoy the process, and celebrate my own milestones. Almost sounds like maturity.

My family brought me so much joy this year I could burst. My boys are growing up, and in spite of my motherly anxiety and outbursts they have sweet moments of tenderness and responsibility that amaze me. This year we had a baptism and I also got to enjoy the warmth of having a son really utilize his priesthood and become a servant to others. These are moments that words will just ruin, so I won't even try.
Are they perfect- well, if you have been following my blog you know that is a big fat NO- but it gives me so much happiness and contentment to wrap my arms around them every night and kiss them, hug them, squeeze them, and tell them I love them. Motherhood is truly so satisfying for me I am overwhelmed by humility to live it daily. (Except for the days when I hide in my bedroom and watch Lifetime.) But most of the time I am happy to report I appreciate what I have with them.

My marriage has done a complete turn around. Most of you who know me in real life may assume that my marriage has always been just right. Most of the time, it has been. But we have had a year or two here and there of pain and heartache, and struggles ( of which I am willing to take the blame) and stupidity. We made it through them, God willing.I read the Dr. Laura book, and I swear to you, it has revitalized my love and passion for marriage more than any other single thing I have ever done. My hubby has even made comments that both surprise me and make my day- he appreciates that I appreciate. And with all the thugs in this world why shouldn't I? He loves me, supports me, whisks me around the world, can be incredibly romantic, and more than anything else- he just GETS ME. I would not be the person I am without him, and I am so in love with him!

I also hit a wall in my calling. Sundays were spent anxious and nervous, the week was long and I would worry. I spent and afternoon crying to the Bishop. "I am not the one for this job"......but somewhere between then and now someone else has taken over the reigns and I am not driving this cart anymore..... it has been an amazing experience (I highly recommend it) and I can be happy again with the children I work with.

I did laundry without complaining.........

I planned meals a week at a time (on good weeks) ......

I got fired up over politics and wrote letters to leaders.....

I have traveled,I have paid off debts and bought new things with cash, I have ran in the rain, I have sang with the Shape Note Singers, I have read 47 books, I have tried to keep my sink clean, I have napped with a soft fuzzy eye mask on, I worked and been given GREAT tips, I have seen family, had long talks, downloaded crazy music and danced around my house, ate FABULOUS cake and meatloaf and sea food, I have hiked the hills in Japan,I have talked to Dave Ramsey, I have walked through the Scared Grove, I have ridden The Mummy 4 times in a row, I have boogie boarded and smelled the beach, hosted a party, learned how to text, hosted book club, volunteered at school, spent a week with sisters shopping and crafting, fought for my child's rights, witnessed stitches and teeth pullings and ortho adjustments, learned how to make charms, sewn an apron, made a fool of myself and said things that I shouldn't have......

I didn't lose all the weight I would like to, or win a jackpot of money, or dirve a fancy car, or move into a new fancy house.....but it is so strange how those things are mattering less to me as they years sneak up on me......

I can't even come close to finishing the reasons why this year has been so wonderful to me, but if I could just ask for the gift of more years like this one....or at least the wisdom to enjoy what the year deals me, I will continue to still consider myself

"Better Than I Deserve".

I can not say it better

....than a prophet.

As a prophet reveals the truth it divides the people. The honest in heart heed his words, but the unrighteous either ignore the prophet or fight him. When the prophet points out the sins of the world, the worldly either want to close the mouth of the prophet, or else act as if the prophet didn't exist, rather than repent of their sins. Popularity is never a test of truth. Many a prophet has been killed or cast out. As we come closer to the Lord's second coming, you can expect that as the people of the world become more wicked, the prophet will be less popular with them.

Ezra Taft Benson

I was inspired by Rindee to post my feelings today, and I will keep it short. Then tomorrow you may enjoy a happy charm drawing free of any political stance.

I love many people who choose not to do right, but it does not force me to pass laws in their favor. I do not understand how this comment is less brave than one that supports abortion, same sex marriage, or any thing else the world wants me to believe has no consequence. I do not write this to persuade you to follow my beliefs, just to let you know where I stand. I remember raising my arm to sustain a prophet, and I will continue to do so. I also believe that we can live together, we can build a country, we can raise children without fighting about it.

Don't get mad....just think about it.

Desperate Times call for....

Desperate measures.

I have waited 10 months to do it, and today is the day. It is up to me to complete the assignments of young children that will have parents and grandparents alike beaming with joy and pride.

That's right, it is time for our Primary Program.

I thought I would work a little on this every month, making it one easy thing to tie together at the end of the year, HOWEVER in true Burton fashion I have waited until the last minute. We are reviewing the program as a presidency in church on Sunday. (Molly, don't tell anyone I am such a procrastinator !) SOOOO..................

I am armed today with a 44 oz Diet Dr. Pepper (am I not drinking soda?), croissant sandwiches left over from last night, in my Jimmie Johnson pj's (much to Mike's dismay- he is a FORD fan) with unwashed hair and traces of make-up clinging on. I am at the computer and cannot leave until I am done. (oh!!! the blogging and Facebook temptations. Wicked wicked world!!!)

I am messy and focused.

It is how I work best.

Palmyra New York

IN honor of our Conference weekend...... a few religious photos from vacation.

The first is taken in the Sacred Grove. I will be in big trouble if I don't inform you MIKE took this picture. I loved walking through the grove.... I learned some amazing things while pondering there. Maybe someday I will be inspired to share them here, but for now let it be said... I am so happy to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

Second photo was taken of a display in the HIll Cumorah Visitors center. The Hill Cumorah was beautiful, too. I would love to go back to see the pageant someday.

We went to the temple in Palmyra that night (after the Mona Lisa chocolate cake). It was so small and intimate- with gorgeous stained glass sparkling windows of the grove in every window. Mike and I were called as the witness couple- which is always fun on a trip (except for the time I passed out in St.George during the session while kneeling. That wasn't cool.But I did get free crackers.)

I was so glad that we added this to our trip- we did not include it in our original plan, but my traveling man was sure he could get me there. I am so grateful that he did.
The whole feeling at the Smith family farm, the grove, and the hill is so serene and solid. In today's times, I found that extremely invigorating.

How do you Blog Something like this....

Last night I was resting on the couch, enjoying my husband's company, when our phone rang. His 23 year old nephew was in a car accident that killed him instantly. The pale look on Mike's face, the pit in my stomach, the feeling that it just all a weird dream...all of those things took over. We are also on 'cell phone' duty- returning texts he received yesterday and answering to tell people the news. Mike has done a great job of that and didn't want his mom to have to deal with it.

Mike's parents have been taking care of this nephew since his mother (Mike's sister Carrie) died of cancer almost 3 years ago. He has always struggled and really leaned on my in-laws, and my mother in law promised Carrie she would watch over him and give him the help he needs. This is so hard for her, he was working graveyard shift at the grocery store and then driving, earning extra money and trying to make a life for himself. My mother in law is taking this so personal and this boy's dad has struggled with depression since he lost his wife. This puts a greater burden on those around him, and his brother he left behind. A family of four is now a family of two.

I have to look at it all and be reminded of the bigger picture. He had been visiting the cemetery and saying he missed his mom....the family is- as expected-pulling together. We are asking ourselves what we can learn from this, and feeling the peace that comes with knowing he is with his mother, who was so close to him during his life.

I don't want to be a downer and debated whether I should even post today, but how can I not? How can I not remind myself (and you) that life is precious, and that everything we have and experience is such a gift. The shock of an unexpected death is so surreal, but then the peace that comes when you ponder our true existence beyond this can not be explained.....I just wanted to let my feelings out and share this today. They have asked me to sing "Angels" at the funeral...I am not sure how you get through a song like this, it fits his little struggle through life so well...I am extremely honored but very overwhelmed.

Every day is a gift~ and there are greater forces around us at all times, and I hope I can be aware of that and do what I need to do.

Baptism Saturday

There are many things I love about religion. Rituals and ordinances are some of those things. I find great comfort in the timeline of completeing ordinances in our lifetime, and I also find the symbolism of all we do especially inspiring. Baptism is no exception of symbolism and importance in it's rite of passage.

Being Primary President allows me to witness these amazing little children tip toe into a font reaching out to a hand of someone they love. It always touches me, but never so much as when it is my own child. Parker chose to be baptized by his cousin Thomas (Melanie's oldest son,) and had Mike confirm him. This turned out to be so overwhelming and spiritual. The sharing of the day with my sister and her family- and the chance my kids had to see someone they look up to so much perform the baptism was profound.

One of my favorite things about this day is the bond it forms between me and my kids. It has always been a great day, and my kids tend to stay close to me, hugging me and sitting near me, obviously feeling an increase of love in their happiness. Parker was very affectionate and many times during the day wrapped his arms around me, saying "I love you, Mommy". It makes me realize how sensitive our kids really are to these tender feelings of light and truth.

I shared some advice with Parker. I reminded him to pay attention to the feeling he gets when he is baptized and confirmed. Those deep feelings of happiness and self-worth are seeds of our eternal nature. Those seeds are the stirrings of truth, and when you feel those in your life you never need someone else to tell you what to do- for you will be inspired from within to live the life you are meant to live. I am grateful for a belief that allows me to live, and teach, the idea of eternal worth.

I am more gratful that the actions and decisions of a child can inspire us to be better. I realize I have such a long way to go.

In Memory of

In a logical world I know the loss of our Prophet on earth is a blessing for him and his sweet wife. In the emotional world, it still causes me to get emotional. Just this Sunday as I opened the memorial that came with the Ensign I started to cry..... again.

Living less than an hour away from Salt Lake I decided to take my kids to the viewing. We stood in the cold for a while (Parker forgot his coat, so off went mine to cover his little body). Parker kept saying "Mom, are you sure you're okay?" But I honestly just wanted to be there, so it was okay with me. Then they quietly had us wait seated in the conference area. Just looking around at all the people filing through was overwhelming. I started to list all of my memories of this man in my head.... all of his quotes, the "Be's", Standing for Something, the temples, the growth in the church, the press appearances, reading the Book of Mormon (and failing to finish by Decmeber) with millions of other members.... mostly, his little laugh and sense of humor. I felt so honored to be there, so honored to worship, and so honored to belong to the great community of people that is the Latter Day Saint Church.

My kids were quiet and reverent the whole time we watied and as we passed his casket. I hope they will rememebr this moment in their lives and that somehow a little bit of his greatness has touched us all forever.